Moving Mountains

". . .I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."~Matthew 17:20

Last night after Bible study I was talking to one of my Fit Club members and a couple other ladies. They were talking about working in a call center and how they sit so much and how hard it is to get their walks in since it's cold. And if you know me then you already know that I immediately offered some un-excuses for their "reasons." I quoted them the scripture about speaking to the mountain and telling it to move. We can move mountains if we believe we can.

I don't know that God meant that the mountain would literally move, but I believe that it's more about your faith and belief being so big that you no longer see the obstacle as a mountain. You no longer see it as this big, huge, insurmountable thing. Too often we encounter "mountains" and surrender all too soon. We see it looming in the distance and accept defeat. We decide that victory just isn't on the agenda for today and go back to merely existing.

Instead of seeing the mountain, I challenge you to see what is beyond it. I challenge you to come up with an un-excuse for every excuse that comes to mind for why you aren't practicing healthy habits. If you are honest with yourself, you may come to realize that you just don't care to remove the mountain; you want the results without the climb. Your faith has to be so strong that you believe nothing less than victory is acceptable. Your faith has to be so strong that you keep pushing even when the scale isn't showing you the numbers you think you want. Faith? Yes, faith.

While on an a hellacious 15k I learned a lesson in faith--I was literally on a mountain!! There were points during the race when I was praying for a bike or van or go cart to pick me up. There were times when I didn't think my legs could take me any further. Once I stopped crying and praying for an easy way off the mountain, I put my shoulders back, turned up my music, pumped my arms and step by step moved forward along the course towards victory.

Victory requires that you be courageous. Courage requires faith. Faith requires action.

Undigested Knowledge

"The great end of life is not knowledge, but action. What men need is as much knowledge as they can assimilate and organize into a basis for action. . ." ~Thomas Henry Huxley

Losing weight is not rocket science. I've lost weight by taking diet pills, following diet fads, attempting to starve myself, wearing contraptions and devices, even weight loss surgery. All these methods can work to lose weight, but once you get back to real life you tend to find all that weight you lost. The problem then, is not losing the weight (I actually prefer the term "shedding" instead of "losing" because when you shed something you don't get it back). The problem is maintaining a lifestyle to never get it back.

I remember back in the fall of 2009 I had to make the hard choice to give up my YMCA membership because I just couldn't afford it anymore.  At that time I was about six or seven months post surgery and was probably around 280 lbs and I was scared of gaining back whatever weight I had lost. I was also scared of not losing anymore weight. It seemed like everytime I got into a stride with the whole fitness thing life would throw me a curveball and I'd end up back in the dugout (I know nothing about baseball so that's the end of that metaphor!). I thought about how I could be active without depending on a gym, an instructor, any eqiupment, etc. The answer: running.

My first attempt at running was based on an article in Muscle&Fitness Hers that talked about interval training. I made up my own version of interval training and would hit the pavement in the evenings after putting the boys to sleep. . .then it got cold. It would be another six months or so before I ventured back into the world of running. I didn't know much about running so I read a few articles on Runner's World website and put together a training plan based on Hal Higdon and Jeff Galloway's plans. With my goal in mind and a little bit of knowledge I set off to make it happen.  Along the way I have picked up nuggets of knowledge and put them to use.

Why am I telling you this? I'm telling you this because the lesson I learned is that knowledge is useless without the application. I also learned that you don't have to every detail in order to DO something. So, again, why am I telling you this? Because too often we start our journey at a breakneck pace and get all this information on exercise, dieting, superfoods, supplements, etc and we go hard for a week. What is the use of all that knowledge if you're not doing anything with it?

The most effective thing you can do to get on the right track to fitness is to GET ON THE TRACK. Once you're on it you will pick up nuggets along the way to help you move more efficiently. So what that your sister is all into eating clean. For now, you just need to focus on eating better and clean it up as you go along. Mature in your journey before you start getting fancy. So what that your cousin does Crossfit five days a week. For now, you just need to focus on being ACTIVE on a consistent basis before you drop the deniro for something like that.



(No, this is not my foot.)



Do what you can with what you have, right where you are. My first jogs were in shoes that I bought from Goodwill that were about a half-size too small for running; my toenail turned black and fell off. Freaked me out! But from that I learned the importance of proper fitting running shoes. My first forays into preparing healthy meals for my family included a lot of processed foods. But along the way I've learned how to make better choices and how to eat healthier on a budget.

Your actions will net you results. If you stay on the track you will get better at it. I have people asking me for help all the time and my first suggestion for them is to exercise 3-4 times a week for 30-45 minutes a day for three weeks and track what they are eating (with adjustments made accordingly). Why? Because I want to see if they line up their actions with their words. I want to see if they are willing to invest the time in themselves. Are you ready to do something different to BE something different? It's not rocket science. . .it's applied science.

Live @ Premiere Supper Club - Hollywood by Giancarlo Chersich

Live @ Premiere Supper Club - Hollywood by Giancarlo Chersich

The M Factor

All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another. ~Anatole France

While I have opinions galore, I do not claim to be an expert on fitness, nutrition, and weight loss. I am not the fittest person I know. I am not the fastest person I know. I am not the strongest person I know. I am not the most perfect eater (dieter?) I know. Lately people have been saying I inspire them or I help them stay motivated. People ask me what I've done to lose weight and keep it off. They ask about eating habits, exercising, meal planning, etc. I don't profess to know all the answers, but I can tell you what I know for sure is the most important factor in the equation: YOUR MIND!

Get your mind right! You can have the best plan in the world, best trainer, best support system, all the time in the world, the best equipment, best shoes, best outfit (can a girl get some Athleta or Northface??). . .and none of it matters until you are mentally ready to change. Here's the truth: everyone wants results but very few are willing to commit to the behaviors that net results. This truth applies to every area of our lives. There are Christians who want the blessings of God without following the will of God (which is not always easy!). There are those who want six-figure lives without doing the work it takes to make those six-figures. There are those who want the benefits of an abundant life without ever changing.

You will forever battle with weight and body image (or finances or relationships, etc) until you determine in your mind that you are willing to do something different to net a different, desired result. We are so quick to make excuses or justifications for how and why we do things, and yet we want a different result. We want change to be comfortable, friendly. We want change on our terms, in our time, in our own way. Well, do we really want change? Do we really want a different result if we aren't willing to do something different to get it?

A person says, "I like group fitness classes. I can't workout by myself." There are a host of free and low-cost classes around town at all times of the day, and yet she never goes to any. Or if she goes she has to enlist other friends to go with her. And even then, she only goes a couple of times. So how badly does she really want change? What is she willing to do differently to net the desired result? Until she is willing to get out of her comfort zone she will not see change. Until she purposes in her mind that what she "likes" is not getting her anywhere, she won't get anywhere. She will look up and five years later she will be living the same cycle of behavior.

A person says, "I don't like this food or that food. It's okay to have some (insert your fav food) every now and then." But he doesn't have it every now and then; he has it just about every other day. Then he half-heartily tries healthier options, always with the predetermined mindset that he won't like it. What kind of result can he expect? It's not really about the food, is it? As time passes all those "every now and then" moments add up to clogged arteries, intestinal issues, heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure and a host of other preventable ailments.

Some of us don't consider ourselves worthy enough to even try to live differently. Some of us are complacent about our lives and don't strive to thrive; we merely exist. There are people out there who look in the mirror with disgust and then eat. Then they feel disgusted with themselves for eating and cut themselves down even more. They decide that the abundant life was not meant for them and that negativity spills over into other parts of their lives. How can you ever have change if you can't "see" it for yourself? We walk around living dimished lives because we have not allowed ourselves to be greater.

You may never decide to run, and that's fine. However you decide to embark on this journey, the place you must start is with your thinking and your mental fortitude. The work you put forth in clearing out the negative and self-destructive thinking and emotions will pay off tremendously. When that alarm goes off in the morning it's not your body that's unable to move (well. . .in most cases). Your body will follow what your mind tells it. When you're eating, your stomach knows it's full but there is something in your mind that keeps the food coming. When you're exercising and it starts getting tough, it is your mind that will carry your body through the workout.

If you want lasting change you have to get your mind right. Otherwise, you'll be like the children of Israel circling the same mountain for 40 years. What a waste! What could they have built in those 40 years if they had let go of the junk in their minds? What could they have experienced if they had just allowed their minds to be renewed and followed the instructions given to them? How much of your life have you wasted walking around the same problem? Are you ready to do something different?

Ramblings. . .

There are so many thoughts in my head that I'm not sure how to sum them all up in one blog, so play along with me as I get it all out.

P90X
Today is the end of Week 6 of my P90X journey--so I'm half way through the program. I can tell changes in my strength and inches lost, but I haven't had a huge weight loss. Honestly, I can't say that I'm disappointed because I haven't followed the meal plan and I'm still skipping Yoga X and Ab Ripper most of the time :( The ugly truth!! I love the weight days and both Kenpo X and Plyometrics, but I avoid yoga and abs like the plague. My goal this week is to batten down the hatches and stick to the plan.

I love the changes that I'm noticing in my arms, shoulders, back and chest. I'm really wanting to invest in a pull-up bar and more weights to complete this next half of the program.

Running
Freaking awesome! I decided not to sign up for my final fall half marathon. Instead my goal this fall/winter is to improve my speed, which includes lowering my 5k speed to sub-40. So far so good because I finished the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure in 39:06. I completed another 5k today which was not timed but with the exception of a couple of detours, my pace was pretty on point. My next two races are both four-milers so we'll see if I can maintain a 12:00 min/mile (or less) over the distance.

Focusing on the shorter distances is fun and a little less daunting than training for half-marathons. I don't think people understand the time and dedication it takes to train for longer distances (when you do it the right way). As I plan out my calendar for next year I'm hesitant to commit to more than three. Not because I don't think I can do it, but because the time involved in training creates issues in my personal life. I play a very delicate balancing act when it comes to work, family, fitness, and service.

I'm still having issues with my right foot, but haven't made time to go to the doctor. I know, bad girl. Ironically, it bothers me mostly when I walk barefoot. Huh?? I find that I have to turn my foot outwards to keep my knee from hurting. . .I know, I know, I need to see a doctor.

Hum-Bug Holidays
Since I've become serious about this fitness journey I've made strides to change the focus of my holidays from food to other things or experiences. I had planned to take my three Menaces to the Gulf of Mexico for Thanksgiving, but instead we are staying put and numerous members of my family are coming. Food is really not a big deal to me. My 80-year old grandmother, on the other hand, acts like it's the center of all things. The woman has been stressing about cooking and getting all the groceries needed. We finally went shopping and I almost had a coronary episode as she was shopping. Chitterlings, hog maws (what the bleep is that??), salt pork, smoked meat, turkey necks, two turkeys, pork ribs, neckbones, dressing, potato salad, macaroni and cheese, 4 pks of butter, a bag of rolls, 2 HUGE blocks of cheese. . . Before I never thought about what was in the food. But now I'm more conscious and am not really looking forward to it.

Thankfully, I'm coming up with a couple of alternatives that I can eat and not have to worry about it. I've also signed up to run a Thanksgiving Day race. I'm sure there will be some in my family who think I'm loony or will say "one day won't hurt you." And no, it probably wouldn't. But why derail all my hard work for one day? And why not show my family that there are other alternatives? Some of them have diabetes, some have blood pressure issues, and a few are overweight. Maybe all it takes is one of us making a different choice. . .

Other Thoughts
A few people have asked me about LapBand surgery, which I had back in March 2009. While some may judge me for having had surgery or discount my weight-loss because of it, I have no regrets. However, I would caution anyone exploring this option to understand that it is not a cure-all. It still takes work and changing your life, otherwise you will be dependent on adjustments (when your doctor fills/unfills your band) to get results. The surgery is a tool and you should use it as such. For me, it has helped with portion control and practicing good habits--like eating slowly, filling up with protein and veggies before starches, recognizing when I'm full, and not eating right before bed. Some people don't need help doing these things. More power to you. When I had surgery I was not at a point to do these things on my own. I was at a point when I would try portion control but was still hungry so would eat more. . .then beat myself for eating more, so I would eat more. . .then I'd say screw it and start again the next week.

As I've stated before, no method is a cure-all for weight loss. The final equation is eating right + exercise = sustained weight loss. By eating right I include quality of food, quantity of food (calorie count), and frequency of meals. So before you make a decision just know that it will still take work on your part IF you truly want to live a healthier life.

Okay, I'm done with my rambling. Good night, fit world!!

Nine Things Successful People Do Differently - Heidi Grant Halvorson - Harvard Business Review

Nine Things Successful People Do Differently - Heidi Grant Halvorson - Harvard Business Review

Marshmallow Anyone?

 Today one of my co-workers told me about the Stanford marshmallow experiment (don't break out the hot chocolate) and I've reflected on that study a few times today. Basically each child was offered a marshmallow but was told that if they could resist eating it for 15 minutes they would receive two instead of one. The purpose of the study was to understand when the control of "deferred gratification" develops in children. The part of the study that has had me thinking all day is the follow-up analysis. In a nutshell, those who exhibited deferred gratification were more competent and had higher standardized test scores as adolescents. "A 2011 study of the same participants indicates that the characteristic remains with the person for life."

Why did this interest me? Because for the past few days people have asked me about quick fixes for weight loss and I keep coming back to the same response: there is no quick fix. Instant gratification is just that, instant. Once the instant is done, so is the gratification. What I need people to really "get" and understand is that no matter what method you use for instant weight loss, your gratification is only temporary unless you change your diet and exercise behaviors. This is coming from a woman who had weight-loss surgery. I've known persons who had liposuction and who pop B12 pills/shots and HGH shots only to gain back whatever weight they've lost. Had I not made an effort to change my behaviors I don't know that I would feel as vivacious, strong, and ready to take on any challenge that comes my way. The behavior changes didn't just effect my weight, they effected how I live my life. Friends of mine have also had surgery and have lost the weight, but their lifestyles really have not changed. The only difference is that they are smaller versions of themselves. For some, that may be enough, but for us marshmallow defferers (yes, I made up a word) that is simply not enough.

If you are serious about changing your life and becoming healthier, then don't seek the instant gratification. When you step up to the starting line for this journey I want you to understand that the "win" is not the finish line, but rather in how well you travel along. Some may sprint out ahead of you and lose 20 lbs, but look around two months later and see if they have kept that off and if they are still losing. You are winning when you learn to navigate efficiently along the course. What do I mean by that? 

You are winning when you begin to see food as fuel and not this evil/Divine thing; it is amoral and has only the value we give it. You are winning when you can put off the instant gratification in order to bring your vision to fruition. You are winning when you use the other methods (surgery, supplements, wrapping, etc) as tools rather then "fixes." You are winning when you exercise because you're worth it and not because you hate how you look. You are winning when you enjoy the journey and exhibit grace with yourself because you know that you're in this for the long haul, not just some sprint to fit into a pair of jeans.

That is not to say that we should not have goals. On the contrary. Goals are milestones that confirm that we're moving in the right direction. Reaching goals gives us the momentum to keep moving forward, to keep practicing healthy behaviors. Those behavioral changes do not happen overnight. I've been at this seriously for about 16 months and with each day I have my "Es," "Ss," and "Ps"--for you non-kindergarten parents that's "Excellent," "Satisfactory," and "Progressing." I tell my team all the time, the goal is not perfection but rather consistency. When you are consistent in delaying gratification and practicing healthy behaviors, the reward is weight loss, increased stamina, increased strength and overall health. You will then notice that you view yourself differently; you begin to understand that YOU are worth the wait. YOU are worth the journey.



Food Addiction?

Today on my Facebook page I posed the question: Is food addiction real? Is it learned or is it written on your DNA? Can you ever really recover?

 

I workout 4-6 times a week and love it, but my challenge is consistently eating well. Yes, I eat so much better than I did a year ago but I am frustrated with myself because I feel like I should "get it" by now. My head knows what's right and what the best choices are, but something happens when I actually encounter the food that I don't really know how to explain.

 

While eating dinner last night I stopped to observe my five year old and almost cried because I saw myself in him. He was eating very fast and had food in both hands. It's like he was trying to eat it before it jumped off his plate. Then I realized that it wasn't the first time I'd noticed that. The kid has a "thing" for food. Will he suffer with obesity? Will he struggle with his weight the way that I have? Am I doing enough to set a good model for him to follow now?

 

Lately I've been reading a lot about whole foods, macro-nutrients, organic foods, etc. There is so much information out there and sometimes even the stuff you think is healthy can be counter-productive. As I navigate this side of my journey I realize that this will be much harder than the physical aspect. I may never completely recover from my food addiction. I may always have to remind myself that "I am not a refrigerator; I was not made to store food."

 

I checked out the Food Addicts In Recovery website and almost cried because I answered yes to enough questions to stop counting. Part of why I stopped Weight Watchers is because constantly calculating and thinking about food made me THINK ABOUT FOOD all the time. And my stress at figuring up numbers would get me to eating. Such a crazy cycle. Even now I will sometimes eat something and think, "Well, let me do a set of push ups, squats and jumping jacks to help burn it off quicker." Or I'll have some unplanned item and feel so much shame and guilt because of it. I want to be rid of the shame and guilt that exists in my relationship with food.

 

I probably may never be able to keep Klondike bars safely in my freezer or chips (even brown rice chips) in my cabinet because I cannot always be trusted. The main purpose of food is FUEL. I know this in my head and I understand the physiological purpose of food, but something in my mind ties food to other things. I literally have to talk myself out of indulging in things sometimes, and I'm not always successful. Sometimes when I am eating and I feel full I have to make myself stop. If you have never experienced this, I don't know that I can fully explain it.

 

Please understand, that I do not pose the question as a justification or excuse for practicing unhealthy eating habits/behaviors, but rather because if I am to move forward I have to understand this thing so that I can reach my goal. Admitting that I'm a food addict is not a cop-out but more about me being honest and admitting to myself that I still have work to do.

 

As I move forward, my goal is three fold:

1.  Consume a majority of clean, whole food
2.  Consistently plan my meals and "cheat" on a daily/weekly basis
3. Consistently practice proper portion control

 Am I really ready for this part of my journey?

 

Patches of Time

Much may be done in those little shreds and patches of time which every day produces, and which most men throw away. ~Charles Caleb Colton

As I sit here 25 days away from the Women's Half Marathon-Nashville I am a little baffled at how magical time can be. There are moments in the day when the minutes seem to last forever, but then you look up and a year has passed. Looking through old photographs, reading old journal entries, seeing friends from your past; all these things remind us of how drastically life can change over time.

This year is so different from last year. . .some good, some not so good. Last year one of my driving forces was the fear of not finishing. That fear kept me pushing because I refused to make a fool of myself by falling out of the race midway or being picked up by the sweep truck. I was also driven by the amazement of the things that I was accomplishing. I almost couldn't believe that I was actually walking 6, 7, 8, 13.1 flipping miles!! It seemed so insurmountable then. . .

I'm thankful that I will be stronger and more confident this time around, as this will be my 4th half marathon in a year (whoa nelly!). I am also thankful that a couple of the women from the Fit Girl Posse running group will be participating as well. Last year, God sent my friend Sandy as my angel that day. I was so thankful that I was not alone. While we didn't run the race together, she was there with me at the start and was there to capture my (emotional) finish on video. This year, I hope to be that witness for my FGP buddies. I am so excited to be able to share this part of their journey.  

No, I'm not immediately enthusiastic when my alarm goes off at 4:45am (I've had to set it 15 minutes earlier b/c I kept hitting snooze too often). No, I don't bound out of bed whistling and revving to go. Each morning I have to remind myself why I do what I do. I remind myself of what I've gained by making the commitment each day to live differently than years past.  My enthusiasm doesn't kick in until I'm about half a mile through my run and even then I rely on my inner coach to prod myself to keep going past 1 mile (if time permits). I want to be the person I am now. A few years ago I used to daydream about being someone different. . .wasting time and precious moments of my life.

I am not the fastest. I am not the most experienced. I am not the slimmest. But I bet I could probably win a medal for most enthusiastic. Whenever I race I'm always encouraging others along the course or waving to the volunteers or dancing for the musicians--or because a good song is playing on my iPod (I tend to sing and dance a little as I run/walk). Whatever I lack in speed and agility I make up for in enthusiasm and heart. Part of that is because I understand that there is joy in the pursuit, not just the completion. I don't wait until the end to enjoy the race. Every mile I complete is a mile further away from diabetes, heart disease, feelings of inferiority, depression. . .every mile is a step closer to that dream God hid in my heart so long ago. Every patch of time I have is worth something to me. How can I not find joy in that? How can I not be enthusiastic about that?

Breaking Past the Breaking Point

Breaking point: 1) The point at which physical, mental, or emotional strength gives way under stress; 2) the point at which a situation becomes critical; 3) the point at which something loses force or validity.

In so many ways this has been an awesome year so far. I can say with no qualms that I love my life. Don’t get it twisted, I’m not saying my life is perfect but when I look at the sum total I am content. But every now and then I get frustrated and I have those moments when I just want to stay under my covers and not tackle the world for the day. Those moments have been coming a lot more often the past month and I’m trying to understand it and work my way through it because being sad/tired/frustrated seems to make time drag and takes so much more energy. Negativity is draining but positivity is energizing. Think about it. When you’re around a group of positive people you kind of feel a little “electric” yourself. But when you’re around a bunch of mumbling, complaining, sad people it takes a toll on you. “A cheerful heart is good medicine but a crushed sprit dries up the bones” (Proverbs 17:22).

As of today I am only at 25% of my goal for the year. I know that I work hard. I know that I eat way better than I did last year. I also know that basic math never lies; to lose weight you have to consume less calories than you expend. So my truth is staring me dead in the face and I have to confront it so that I can reach my goal. Up to this point the work I’ve put in has been enough, but because I have fewer fat stores it seems like my body is making me really fight for these last 50 lbs. This is the point at which I’ve faltered before.

Back in 2003 I lost 60 lbs in about six or seven months. I spent 2 hours in the gym, five days a week and got down to a solid size 18 (from a 24/26, 312 lbs) and 252. And then. . .NADA! I stopped dropping pounds. I hooked up with a personal trainer and did three sessions a week but still zilch. By that October I started giving up little by little. I started allowing “red light” foods back into my regular diet, the amount of time I spent in the gym decreased, and I stopped seeing what was possible because all I could see was the number in front of me on the scale. I had hit my breaking point and caved in; I didn’t even fight.

I feel that same thing happening to me right now. Those little voices are saying, “Maybe it’s not meant for you to be any smaller. Why are you working so hard? If you could just do this or that maybe it would be easier.” My inner coach’s voice is even diminished sometimes and it’s hard for me to mentally put myself back in the game. The crazy thing is, I’ve lost more at this point than what’s left to lose. If this were a half-marathon it would be mile 7, that point at which you have more course behind you than in front of you. That’s when I tell myself there is no turning back; there is no giving up because I’m almost done.

I am sharing this with you because if you are at your breaking point, I encourage you to keep pushing. If you’re like me you’ve hit this point a time or two before and gave in. Ask yourself, “What was the result?” Did giving up get you any closer to what you wanted? Did you feel any better after you gave up? Imagine what is possible if you stay in the game and get past that breaking point. Maybe you’ll see a difference next week, next month. You never know what you’re fully capable of if you never allow yourself to get past the breaking point. For myself, I am doing some soul searching and learning how to deal with my food addiction (yes, I have that) and coming to terms with making some drastic changes in my diet.

What I know for sure is that I’ve come too far on this journey to let 50 lbs keep me from claiming victory. This moment shall pass and at the end of it I will be stronger and a step or two closer to my goal.

Trying Shakeology (Finally!) and a Recipe

Trying Shakeology (Finally!) and a Recipe

Weekend Recipes

Preparing myself for the weekend with some healthy "bad girl" recipes. Enjoy!!

This is a slightly sweeter take on a classic vodka
tonic, yet it clocks in at about 150 calories.

The Big Apple 

Ingredients

• 4 tablespoons apple vodka (or regular vodka plus a splash of apple liqueur)  
• 3 tablespoons club soda  
• Splash of lemonade

 Preparation

In a cocktail shaker, combine apple vodka, club soda, and lemonade; shake well and serve over ice. Cheers!
(http://www.myrecipes.com/)

 Fruity Sangria

• 1 cup dry, red wine 
• 3 cup cold, low-cal cranberry juice cocktail 
• 2 cups chopped strawberries 
• 2 medium apples, chopped 
• 1/8 tsp ground cinnamon, or to taste

Stir together all ingredients in a large pitcher; allow to stand for 30 minutes. Place ice in glasses and serve. Yields about ¾ cup per serving.

(from Weight Watchers, 2pt on the PointsPlus program)

Blueberry Squares

• 1 pkg Angel-Food cake mix 
• 1 pkg (22oz) light blueberry filling

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Combine 1 pkg angel-food cake mix with 22 oz light blueberry filling (do not add any other ingredients). Pour batter into an ungreased 9x13 inch baking dish. Bake for 30 minutes. Cool and cut into 24 pieces. I pc per serving.  (from Weight Watchers, only 2pts PointsPlus plan)

 Light Nachos

Ingredients

•  1/2 cup shredded chicken breast  

• 1 ounce baked yellow corn tortilla chips  
• 1/4 cup low-fat refried beans or black beans 
• Chopped tomatoes and scallions, to taste 
• 5 tablespoons reduced-fat shredded Mexican cheese mixture

Preparation

Place chips on a cookie sheet; top with ingredients, then bake for 5 minutes at 400°.

Nearly 25 fewer fat grams and 373 fewer calories than traditional nachos, thanks to baked tortilla chips, low-fat beans, and reduced-fat cheese. Bueno!!
(http://www.myrecipes.com/)

Magic Pills and Blueprints

"Compare yourself against yourself, and no one else. You're not working with their body, you're working on yours, whilst it's good to have an idea of how you want to look, don't go competing with the fitness instructor at your gym. Compete against the person in the mirror because that's what important." --forum post from Bodybuilding.com

"Really, if there was an easy solution, Oprah would have bought it," ~Kara Curits

I have a really bad habit of comparing myself to other people and then beating myself up. For years I have had this problem and it's not something that is fixed overnight and with regard to my weightloss journey it's really annoying.

It's no secret that I've been a little frustrated this past month because I feel like my weightloss has stagnated--even though my general fitness has improved and I haven't gained any weight. I've tweaked some things with my eating and this week have been on a white-out diet (not 100% successful but still an improvement). I've started taking P90X Peak Health Formula supplements to keep my energy up and combat that run-down feeling I was getting mid week. Anyone looking at my efforts would scratch their head and wonder why I'm not seeing results.

This morning I read about a local trainer who lost 170 pounds in 7 months all on her own--no surgery, no magic pills.  Daily I read about other coaches and Beachbody customers who drop 60-100 pounds in a matter of months. I read about other people who have had bariatric surgery and dropped 100 pounds in their first year. I cannot help but ask myself, "what's wrong with me? why isn't my story like thiers?" It has taken me what seems like forever to lose 89 pound--that's with surgery and busting my butt. My doctor wants to give me an adjustment (that means add more fluid to my band) but I keep saying no because I want to go the rest of this journey on my own. There is something I have to prove to myself.

The question that's been mulling around my head lately is "Is it worth all this effort?" I know the answer to that question. I know deep down that I'm not doing this for the superficial benefits. I know that I am stronger, faster, healthier than I've ever been. I know that the time and effort I put into my health is worth it. As much as I know all of this, it is still frustrating. And yet every morning I whisper a prayer and get up for my 5am workout. Four days a week I pack my bag for my lunchtime workout. Every Thursday I meet with my fit club. I will not give up nor give in because I've come too far.

On August 1st Beachbody is starting a new challenge and as much as I love cash and prizes, my goal is to lose 1.5 lbs a week until the end of the year. I want to end 2011 weighing under 200 lbs because I have not been under that mark since I was 12 years old. Embarking on the challenge also means that I have to stop just doing it my way and follow the full program. I am ready to go to the next level and I'm willing to do what it takes to get there--which does not include that elusive magic pill.

 

The Fat to Fit Chronicles: Signs and Sighs Along the Way

The Fat to Fit Chronicles: Signs and Sighs Along the Way: "'We are not retreating - we are advancing in another direction.' ~Douglas MacArthur There are times when I absolutely love my life. . .a..."

Signs and Sighs Along the Way

"We are not retreating - we are advancing in another direction." ~Douglas MacArthur

There are times when I absolutely love my life. . .and then there are times when I look up to the sky and ask "Really?? Seriously, this is my life???" Those times are typically when I've said for the umpteenth time, "Stop sitting on your brother!" or "Put! On! Your! Shoes!" or my favorite "We do this every morning, people! Brush your teeth!"

Oh, the pleasure and pain of motherhood. Add to that my attempts to work full time, build a fitness business, and continue my weight-loss journey and what you have is a recipe for a comedic drama with musical numbers sprinkled in the mix.



Saturday morning at 4:36am my eyes pop open and I immediately squeeze them shut willing myself to go back to sleep until 5:00am. As 4:59 rolls by I sigh and roll out of bed to sip from the glass of water at my bedside. Today my group is on schedule to complete six miles along the course for the Women's Half Marathon. "Time to burn the donuts," I mumble under my breath. From there I make the mad dash to load the cooler with water and Gatorade, check the hourly temperature forecast, throw on my duds (had to test my new running tank), threw some clothes in a backpack for the boys, made us all toast (sandwich rounds) with peanut butter and banana slices, double-checked my route map and directions, then loaded everything up in the car. I dropped the boys off at my friend's house and proceeded to the starting point for the route.

It was such a beautiful morning. . .and I wanted to be at home in my bed. No one from my crew was joining me so I almost high tailed it back to my neighborhood with the promise of doing it later, but I knew as soon as I said it that something would happen and it wouldn't get done. Decision made. I then took my car key off the ring to clip onto my hydration belt, grabbed a bottle of water and my iPod--only to discover that my iPod was DEAD. What the what??!! Six miles without tunes? No way, Jose! Then I remembered that I still had my old faithful Sony MP3 player in my purse so we were back in business. And that's when I realized I needed a restroom. Seriously?? For ten whole seconds I contemplated just chalking this up as a sign from God that I wasn't meant to run. Then I quit trying to pin it on God and got out of the car. I figured I'd hit up a bathroom somewhere along my route if it got too bad. This nutso thinking is how you know you're a runner!

As I hit the pavement I was struck again by how gorgeous it was. My route started on the backside of Centennial Park, near the HCA building, and went along 31st into the Vanderbilt area all the way to Belmont University (3 miles) where I would then turn around and reverse the route. This route looked very different back in September 2010 with volunteers, racers, and bystanders cheering on us racers--and people standing in line at the port-a-pottys. I couldn't help but wonder if the other women I saw running and walking along the route were also training for the WHM. That thought made me feel a sense of belonging, like we were kindred. .. until the ponytail swingers passed me. I had to fight the urge to speed up. Instead I returned my focus to my pace, my form, my foot strike, my breathing. . .

Before I knew it I was at Belmont Blvd, in front of Belmont University. I looked askance at my watch because I couldn't believe that I finished the first three miles in 37 minutes. Who? Me? I was feeling pretty proud of myself as I turned around. At one point I came to a street without a sign (Fairfax??) but instinctively knew which direction to take. I patted myself on the back for having such a great sense of direction. As I jogged up Natchez Trace I let my mind wander and started thinking about paying off my car note and planning another cruise vacation. . .then I looked up and realized that I had no clue where I was. Auntie Em!

I stood at the corner of Natchez Trace & Blakemore staring at my route directions--minus the bleeping map because I had given it to my Menaces to play treasure hunt--trying to figure out if anything around me looked familiar. It didn't. I vaguely recalled that 31st turned into Blakemore at some point so I picked a direction and went for it. Five minutes down the road nothing looked familiar so I trekked back to the corner of Natchez & Blakemore. Plan B: Natchez Trace leads to Centennial Park so I started up Natchez. I passed by ball fields that I swear I had never seen before. Oh, Toto!

Ten minutes later I came to the corner of Natchez Trace & West End, across the street from Centennial Park. Part of me wanted to just cut through the park and call it a day, but the other part of me, the nutcase, trekked west for five blocks to get back on my route at 31st. I read the street sign and chuckled: it said 31st -->, Blakemore <--. (sigh, really??)

After getting lost and adding some distance I finished in 1:30 and I felt great. I even sprinted from the Centennial Park sign to my car as if it were the finish line. LOL! I was smiling so hard and it felt so good to open up the speed. A glorious ending to a very hilarious morning. Gotta love my life :)

To become a member of Jenita Lawal's team, please visit www.beachbodycoach.com/fitgirlposse  and sign up for a free membership. To view the Fit Girl Posse run/walk schedule, visit http://www.fitgirlposse.com/. Follow us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/fitgirlposse  or Twitter @FitGirlPosse.

This. Is. B-A-N-A-N-A-S!!!

Completely ludicrous! It's bananas, yo! It's amazing to me how jacked up our rationalizations and emotions can be. So, it's no secret that I've been a little frustrated for the past month because my outter appearance is not matching up with my inner She-Ra. As much work as I put in, I feel like I'm not seeing any results. The scale plays sick tricks with my head, so I just sneer at it most days and keep pressing on. This frustration I'm feeling leads me to inner stress, which conjures up my old habit STRESS EATING. And then once that begins, my old buddy BANGETH THY HEAD AGAINST A WALL shows up. These two old girls make me sick, serioulsly.

Today I ate a whole pack of Wholly Guacamole--that's 13 servings at 60 calories per serving--along with half a bag of brown rice chips. This is what I consumed from about 8am (yes, breakfast) until 1pm. Then I started berating myself and feeling like a failure, a fraud. It was also around this time that I realized I hadn't had any water all day, so I started chugging water. Sometime around 2pm the migraine set in and I made myself lay down and take a nap. At 3:30 I dragged myself out of bed and got ready to head out to the Mayor's Walk100 celebration. I didn't wear a Beachbody shirt because I felt like I was not a good representative; I felt like a fraud. Once I got there I actually kind of distanced myself from the Beachbody crew because I was about to breakdown crying. One of my BB Buds was so cool, promoting my fit club while he was talking to people and I couldn't muster up the wherewithal to promote myself. So what did I do???? I went to White Castle and got one slider and McDonald's and got a snack size Rolo McFlurry.  THE SHAME!!!!!!!

The question I asked myself as I ate, "how is this helping?" The answer: it did not. The eating just made me feel even worse about myself and negated the work I put in this week. Here I was frustrated by the speed of my aesthetic progress and doing the very thing that would most assuredly stunt any progress. The down and dirty truth about weight loss?? Calories in, calories out. Yes, I've done a great job changing the quality of my diet. Yes, I've done a good job breaking up my meals througout the day. Yes, I understand that food is fuel. But there is a problem with my intake. This is the ugly truth. All the work I put in means nothing if I'm going to continue to undermine my progress.

My doctor wants to see me next month and I don't want him to try and persuade me to get an adjustment--this thought is also part of my stress, like a nagging little voice in my head. I have not had one since April 2010 and honestly, I don't think I need one. I will fully admit that's it's tempting as I watch some around me lose weight easily after getting an adjustment and here I sit at a plateau. I've asked myself, what are you trying to prove? Why not get an adjustment? Because I want to prove to myself that I can do this now. I would feel counterfeit encouraging others when the secret to my loss was a cc or two of fluid added to my band.

I cannot change what I've eaten today. I had hoped to get in my six mile run after the kids went to sleep. . .but of course they decided to aggravate me until 10p. That means that my only activity for today was the 5 minute dance at the Walk100 event today. (sigh) And I'm not fooling myself into thinking that I'm going to pop in a dvd. Today is a wash. Tomorrow is chance to get it right, to stick to the plan, to be the person I know that I am on the inside. Food is not my comfort. Food is not my stress relief. Food is not my refuge.

Honestly, nor is exercise. . .Perhaps I'm feeling so discombobulated lately because I've allowed myself to be disconnected from God. I've not been committed to my morning prayer time. I've not been as focused on my ministry work. I've been living spiritually haphazardly for the last two and a half months, so is it any wonder that everything else is off kilter? So maybe before I go all gang busters with my grocery list and workouts I will start with getting back to my comfort, my stress relief, my refuge. . .my savior.

A Single Step. . .365 days later

"Do the difficult things while they are easy and do the great things while they are small. A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."~Lao Tzu
On July 1, 2010 I embarked on this journey to complete ONE distance race and go from "fat" to "fit." Reading over some of my past posts I am amazed at how much my life has changed in just 365 days. I actually have a hard time remembering what I did with my time in my former life. . .probably watch a lot more television.  Very vividly I recall my excitement at completing my first 1.5 miles of training and calling my mother. I remember my first "fartlek" and my first pair of running shoes (I'm on pair #3).



At the starting line with my co-workers



Today I celebrated by running in the July 4th Music City 10k/5k. I initially signed up to run the 10k but it was hot, humid, hilly and I just wasn't feeling it. Since I've started this journey I've never quit a race or backed off from a challenge. Today I had not qualms about it because it wasn't a matter of ability; I know that I could have done it. The coolest part about today, other than running with one of the ladies from Fit Girl Posse, was running to the finish line behind a little girl carrying Old Glory. Maybe I'm being to deep about this, but it felt like that flag was waving for me, letting me know that I had succeeded, I was victorious.

The glorious finish line



While my journey is far from over, I am so thankful for every accomplishment along the way. I'm thankful for every minute of improvement in my times and the strength I gain every time I hit the pavement/treadmill. So maybe now my journey is not so much about where I've come from but more about who I am becoming.

Let's see what the next 365 (actually 362) days have in store. . .



To become a member of Jenita Lawal's team, please visit www.beachbodycoach.com/fitgirlposse  and sign up for a free membership. To view the Fit Girl Posse run/walk schedule, visit http://www.fitgirlposse.com/. Follow us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/fitgirlposse  or Twitter @FitGirlPosse.







Random Rambling and Rants

Today is one of those days when I have so much to say, so many thoughts that I'd like to share but none of it really flows nicely together and not all of it is cheery.

Here is the truth: going from Fat to Fit is not easy. People looking at me don't know that I've lost 89 pounds; they just see a sorta fat girl. I feel like some people don't take me seriously because I don't fit the mold. And what do I do? I look in the mirror and get frustrated because it feels like I should look so much better than I do. When I look in that mirror I forget how much more of me there used to be. I forget that I lived a lifetime of being overweight and my poor body is doing it's best to transform as fast as I'm kicking it's butt. I get frustrated because my time is limited and there is so much I want to do. I wake up at 5am and get in a run; if I'm even 10 minutes behind schedule it messes up my goal because I have a very limited window in which to accomplish my goal. Every waking moment of my life is centered around being responsible for other people and things; some days I resent it, some days I accept it, some days I cry, some days I pick up my cross and roll on.

Even after losing 89 pounds I still have to lose about 90 pounds to get to a "healthy" weight range. Say what??? How about you take your charts and. . .I digress.

What is the point of all my rambling? THIS IS NOT EASY!! And the trials are not all physical. On top of all of the above I deal with people discounting my accomplishments because I had LapBand surgery. They think because I had surgery weight loss is easy for me. Trust me, it is not. LapBand is not like gastric bypass. You don't get this dramatic loss of 100+ pounds in 6 months. It's slower and honestly, I have no regrets because it's helped me practice healthier eating habits. I haven't had an adjustment since April 2010 and I refuse to get one any time soon because with the way I workout I was constantly battling dehydration and getting enough nutrients to keep my body performing. Even without a fill I can eat like a normal person. I remember before surgery I would watch other people eat and feel like some alien because I wasn't full. I remember eating a 20 piece nugget meal with three sweet & sour sauces. I remember eating a gyro AND a Philly cheese steak sandwich from Wedgy's--with the two bags of chips!! Jesus. . .

As hard as this journey gets sometimes, I am thankful for every challenge and triumph along the way. Sometimes it bothers me that others can't see my awesomeness just by looking at me, but then I remember that I don't do this for them. When I start beating myself up about how I look right now, I remember how I looked "then" and thank God for the progress.

So I hope that when you hit your bumps and potholes you find a way to maneuver around them. It's okay to scream and maybe shout an expletive or two. Once you get it out, get back on the road with exuberance and joy. Do this thing with zeal, with passion, with energy, with tenacity.   

Fit Girl OUT!!!!!!!

Mind, Body, Spirit Moment

A sound mind in a sound body is a short but full description of a happy state in this world. ~John Locke

At this point I probably sound like a broken record, but a couple of conversations over the past week prompt me to restate a former comment: When you start working on improving one element it prompts you to make changes in the other areas.

Last week we a had a pow-wow before TriCord Fit Club that uncovered for one participant that the work she needed to put in was not just physical. How we view ourselves and the self-talk in which we participate effect what we do and how we do it. If I'm constantly telling myself that I'm not worth much, that I'm nothing special then why would I even attempt to go beyond my comfort zone? And are we really comfortable in that "comfort" zone?

The other day I talked to a friend who has been working on improving her health. During the course of that journey she realized that she had been holding on to a relationship that was not healthy for her and if she continued to hold on she would only repeat the patterns that had led to her weight gain.

For me the journey began when I woke up from depression one day and realized that I could get more and do more with my life if I decided to do something different. I started looking for opportunities to make a difference in my community. I let go of a relationship that was not healthy for me. I took time to know my family. And then I was ready to start on the weight loss journey. Now it all moves like the cogs in clock, moving me forward.

Every day is not perfect, but if you take the time to nurture each aspect then we progress toward true "fitness." Maybe that's too deep for some people. Maybe they only care about a dress size. Maybe they only concern themselves with the spiritual things. Maybe they only seek knowledge and mental health. What I know is that a deficiency in one aspect makes for a life lived less fully than God desires for me.


To become a member of Jenita Lawal's team, please visit www.beachbodycoach.com/fitgirlposse and sign up for a free membership. To view the Fit Girl Posse run/walk schedule, visit http://www.fitgirlposse.com/ . Follow us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/fitgirlposse or Twitter @FitGirlPosse

Saving Grace

This past weekend I completed the 13.1 Chicago although if you look for my name on the results page of their site you won't find it. According to the official results only 130 people finished the race. What you miss when you view that page are the stories of all those who finished even after the race was called, the water stations were abandoned, and the clocks turned off. You don't see the determination of those who left it all on the pavement along Lakeshore Drive.



Before the start



I have been looking forward to this race since last November when I participated in the Hot Chocolate 15k/5k in Chicago. I fell in love with Chicago as a racing city. The runners are diverse and anything within the city is flat and fast--coming from Nashville I can so appreciate that.  Unlike my training for the Tom King Classic, I was ready for the distance and apparently for the heat.

Everything about the 13.1 Chicago was great: the registration ($13.10 off the registration fee), the communication, the shuttle set up, the location, the packet pick-up (quick and organized), the after party plan (pizza, beer, and massages--seriously). . .and the flag system.  What could not be controlled was the weather. The day of the race temps were 79 degrees at 7:00am. For runners of a half-marathon, that's not a good thing. The heat makes your effort much harder. The heat means a greater chance of dehydration, leg cramps, sunburn, heat exhaustion or something more serious. . .The race started under a yellow flag which meant that runners were cautioned to slow their pace and stay hydrated.

The day before the race my mission was hydration. During the Tom King Classic I suffered serious leg cramps mid race due to dehydration, high temps, and poor training. I was determined not to repeat my mistakes. The morning of the race I kept working at centering myself, getting my thoughts in check. This was my third venture into half-marathon land but I still had the doubt, the feeling of "who am I to be here" as I looked around at the real runners. I turned on my music, did my warm up, drank three cups of water, prayed, cried a little (yes, I did), and then let it all GO.

When the race started my energy was high--I was dancing and chatting up a storm. My friend Toya was at the end of the starting chute cheering me on. I ran for about 1:30 then started my walk/run intervals, making sure to keep my tempo. Folks looked at me a little strange when I cheered at the end of mile 1. I hit my mark and finished mile 1 in 13:39. Two miles were done in 27:42. Four miles done in 57:38. I was so excited because I was keeping the pace I'd worked so hard for over the past weeks. After mile 5 I started to feel the heat even though I had run smart; I had changed from running intervals to running only in shaded areas or ten minutes into the new mile. So, after mile 5 I stopped running at all and used a faster walk pace.

I was so happy to hit mile 7 because it meant there was more course behind me than in front of me. My happiness turned to annoyance and almost tears when one of coordinators announced that the race had been stopped and we were to head to the shuttles to be driven to the finish line. What?? That explained why the clocks no longer flashed on the mile markers and I hadn't notice the flags changing from yellow to red to black because I was so focused on MY race. A few of us asked if we could finish anyway and they said it was up to us but they were advising everyone to take the shuttles. HELL NO! was my response. I trained for this and I was doing a fabulous job. FIT GIRL, FORWARD!!!



The finish line!!!

 Maybe my righteous indignation put a little more pep in my step. All I know is that I refused to just be handed a medal. To date I don't have any DNFs on my record and I did not travel all the way to Chicago to get one. All of a sudden I heard an old No Limit (you know, Master P and the crew) in my head, "I won't stop now, I can't stop. You can't stop me, so (dude) don't try. We true soldiers we don't stop! We keep rollin nah nah nah nah nah!" With that gusto I finished 8 miles in 1:59:48.

That glory only lasted two more miles because as I cleared mile 9 they pulled all the water stations and left jugs of water with empty cups at the abandoned aid stations. From mile 10 to 12 I kept it conservative and was only focused on finishing, my time no longer a concern. As much as I wanted to finish in less than three hours, my safety came first. At mile 11 I could feel the heat getting to me and when I stopped to get some water my legs started cramping a little.

I was elated as I came into the chute and others shouted "way to go!" "good job" "you did it!".   When I crossed the finish line one of my dearest friends, someone I used to watch run, hugged me and draped my medal around my neck.   What I didn't know as I traversed the last few miles was that another had lost his life due to the heat and 11 others had been taken to the hospital. No, I didn't hit my finish time goal. But I am so thankful that by God's grace I finished, yet again.



Reflecting and relishing the victory



This post is dedicated to Zachary Gregory, the 26 year old runner who lost his life on Saturday, June 4th during the race.

To become a member of Jenita Lawal's team, please visit www.beachbodycoach.com/fitgirlposse  and sign up for a free membership. To view the Fit Girl Posse run/walk schedule, visit http://www.fitgirlposse.com/ . Follow us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/fitgirlposse  or Twitter @FitGirlPosse

Mind, Body, Spirit Moment

"The toughest thing about success is that you've got to keep on being a success." ~Irving Berlin


Wouldn’t it be great if we really could “lose” weight and never “find” it again? The daunting thing about weight-loss is that it’s a never ending journey—or battle in some cases. You “lose” 20 pounds to fit into a wedding dress and brag to all your friends about how well you did and then four months later you’ve found those 20 pounds plus six more. What was the point?

There is no resting on your laurels if you want to keep the weight away. That is the reason why quick fixes and magic creams don’t work. Sustained success takes sustained habits and behaviors that net desired results.

Sometimes that means doing things that don’t come naturally or that go against what feels good in the short-term. That means working past the point where you really want to quit. If you never get past that point how will you ever experience success?


Be Fit4Life!!


To become a member of Jenita Lawal's team, please visit www.beachbodycoach.com/fitgirlposse  and sign up for a free membership. To view the Fit Girl Posse run/walk schedule, visit http://www.fitgirlposse.com/ . Follow us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/fitgirlposse  or Twitter @FitGirlPoss

Reasons, Really

There are so many thoughts going through my head right now. I want to write something inspirational. I want to unload some emotional baggage. I want to wax poetic about my training for the 13.1 Chicago. I want to share the woes and joys of gong from Fat to Fit. . .But I have no idea where to start or how to pour out to you everything that's going through my head. This past week I've been asking myself "why" a lot. Why did I sign up for these damn races? Why do I take on so much? Why does it hurt me when people live up to their pattern and consequently disappoint me? Why do I downplay my accomplishments? Why do I compare myself to other people? 

My 5 yr old running with me at the park.

Why do I keep running? 

I no longer run purely for the weight loss benefits. I run for sanity. I run for that feeling of invincibility. I run because there was a time when I never thought I could. I run because endorphins are legal. I run to show the little stick women with swishing ponytails that athletes come in all shapes and sizes. I run to tune into my spirit. I run so my kids can't catch me (ha ha).

So, I had to ask myself why did I hesitate registering for the Rock N Roll Savannah Half Marathon. I guess a part of me knew that my reason for choosing the race was not fair to me. I chose that race so that my family would have no excuse for not being there. It wasn't because I just love Savannah (which I don't, sorry). No. I did it because I was seeking approval from my family and wanted them to be there to share in something that has become so important to me. I had this vision of them standing at the finish line and me running into their arms and crying tears of victory with a triumphant musical score playing in the background. Sappy, I know.

Here's the truth: my running is not about them and nor is my racing. My family may never come out to support me and I have to learn to be okay with that. One of the hard parts about changing your life is changing your emotional patterns. Remember, your spirit, mind, and body are connected. Your emotions are a part of your spirit and can greatly effect how you treat the other two areas. That's why when you're depressed you sleep and eat (or in some cases starve yourself). Or if you're anxious you have insomnia and eat. When you're seeking love and attention you turn to negative self-talk and eating chips or Klondike bars. . .or is that just me?

So, instead of running in Savannah on Nov 5th I will instead run in the Coastal 1/2 Marathon in Orange Beach, AL on Nov 26th. Yes, that means I'll be on the beach for Thanksgiving. Ahhhh! Now that's being true to me!! Yes, I train because it keeps me focused on fitness but I reward myself by purchasing a race outfit and traveling. Before I started training, travel seemed like a luxury I couldn't afford, but now I plan my travel around my races and it excites me. Next year I would love to run in Bermuda. Oh yeah!!!

What is the point of all this rambling?? DO YOU, FOR YOU!! It's much more rewarding than trying to please others or be someone else.

To become a member of Jenita Lawal's team, please visit www.beachbodycoach.com/fitgirlposse  and sign up for a free membership. To view the Fit Girl Posse run/walk schedule, visit http://www.fitgirlposse.com/ . Follow us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/fitgirlposse  Be Fit4Life!!

Looming in the Shadows

"Two things scare me. The first is getting hurt. But that's not nearly as scary as the second, which is losing."--Lance Armstrong 

Since the day I started this journey one fear has loomed in the shadows. No matter what training plan or course I took on the one thought that reverberated through my mind was "Don't get hurt." I have heard one too many stories about people who suffer an injury then fall back into unhealthy, sedentary habits or who no longer expect victory because of physical limitations. I've held back pushing myself too hard with running because of my fear of injury. So, I have to laugh at the irony of my current situation. I didn't injure myself while running or doing Insanity, a 60-day conditioning program by Beachbody. No heroic story of me tumbling down a hill midstride while on an 8-mile run through the urban oasis of Nashville. . .Nope.

The real story: I twisted my knee while line (or "twine") dancing in flip flops on vacation--no alcohol was involved. The last jump I've been able to do was for the poolside rendition of  the Macarena. To add insult to injury I walked around Downtown Disney on a bum knee for at least two hours. And now I'm sitting here trying to figure out how much time I have to recuperate so that I can finish training for the 13.1 Chicago.

This is where the lessons I've learned over the past year are tested. The first couple of days I was afraid but now I'm all about devising a plan of action because I know that a sedentary life is not for me. I know that I'm not the same person, so that fear has no place to take root. I know that I'm not a quitter, so NOT shooting for completing the race is not an option. Even if I am not 100% by race time, I'm going to stand on that starting line and give it my best shot. I have looked forward to this race since last October and have had a vision of my family sitting along the course supporting me.

So, I will back off a little and allow my knee time to heal. If I don't feel any better by mid week I'll make an appointment with my doctor and go from there. Whatever happens I am no longer afraid of the "What If" looming in the shadows. What if I gain back all that weight? What if I can't run anymore? What if I never get any smaller? What if. . .What if. . .What if I choose to live in victory and not defeat? What if I focus on my possibilities and not my limitations? What if I take each day as it comes and just be grateful for the course thus far? Shadows aren't so scary.

To become a member of Jenita Lawal's team, please visit www.beachbodycoach.com/fitgirlposse  and sign up for a free membership. To view the Fit Girl Posse run/walk schedule, visit http://www.fitgirlposse.com/ . Follow us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/fitgirlposse  Be Fit4Life!!